If I were a cook, the recipe as to where I had dinner and drinks last night may go a little something like this:

• 1 restaurant close to where you live
• 1 restaurant close to where you live that used to be a restaurant you really liked close to where you live
• 75% restaurant, 25% heated patio
• 1 men’s washroom (capacity = 1)
• 1 smallish menu and equally smallish wine list (translation: bar food)
• dash of great yam fries
• pinch of good burgers
• 10 to 15 servers, cooks, bartenders, people in black shirts running around frantically (not as bad as this place, though)
• 1 logo with a great colour scheme
• smattering of semi-over priced items

And there you’d have…Browns Social House in Kitsilano, Vancouver; a 2007 replication of the Yaletown mothership.

As I’ve said many times before, je ne suis pas un restaurant critic. What does that mean? What it means is that you won’t find me yammering on about the dishes, the prices, the presentation, the etc.

What I will tell you though is what you need to know about this place before you decide to go to this place.

Brown’s service in Kitsilano (haven’t been the the Yaletown hub) is attentive, I’ll give them that…you certainly are ‘attended’ to as soon as you walk in. You are not, however, necessarily served as soon as you walk in.

Complete with a velvet/plush/fancy Yaletown-esque VIP rope outside the front door, you will likely wait to get in (yes, just like a night club…except at a pub).

Once you’re in, you will again wait to get served, wait to get dinner, and my favourite…wait to go to the washroom just like you were at a [insert your hockey/football/other type of football/badminton/curling team's name here] game/match/event/bonspiel.

Honestly, I’ve been to campgrounds in the middle of nowhere with faster throughput than this place. Is one washroom (for men – two for women) actually even allowed?

When the smoke clears, the food is better than standard bar fare, the atmosphere is nice (AND LOUD), the LCD TV’s kind of take over the place so don’t get frustrated if your friends’ eyes start to watch the baseball game, news, weather channel, boxing match, or fishing show…you can’t not watch it (double negatives abound), the patio is well-heated and provides a great view of the Shopper’s Drug Mart entrance, and the prices are semi-logical. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not high-end dining, but it’s not Burger King either.

I enjoy the fact that Browns Social House in Kitsilano is close to where I live…it’s easy to get to, easy to order quick eats at, easy to grab a few drinks at, easy to talk loud in, and will be an easy replacement for the Vineyard (rest in peace)…once you get past the line, of course.

darren